The Outfield

The most awkward part of the diamond is the outfield. It’s a respectable place to be on a professional team—but the exact opposite in little league. It’s less of a position and more of a purgatory for dandelion pickers. I learned a lot about fate while waiting in outfields. I dreaded the sound that all … Continue reading The Outfield


When I got home, I decided to move to Mexico, where it never rained. I could wander around drunkenly, knocking on people’s doors and asking for tortillas. I’d be greeted by friendly, perfect, nuclear families.              But shit, what about the cartels?             Ah, right. The cartels. The cartels were pretty bad. The cartels would … Continue reading Mexico

Patio Talk

Vanessa took a long time going away and I was struck by how she walked when she did. She had stopped being someone I knew and was becoming a pedestrian. A short little pedestrian with a bug up her ass. That secret garage released another car, and it stopped to let her cross the street. … Continue reading Patio Talk


Jay and I are laughing. We always laugh when we’ve said something politically incorrect. Jay is snorting, unwilling to let the laughter die. I am also unwilling to let it die. I am standing by our laughter’s hospital bed, looking to the joke doctor, tall, bald, unpleasant, who tells me sternly that the joke is … Continue reading Jay