Let’s get one thing straight before anything else—I did not kick that dog off the bridge.
There’s a difference between kicking and stretching. Most people would agree. One involves the decision to attack something with a foot, in the hopes the powerful muscles in your legs will do significant amounts of damage to something you dislike. The second involves a pretty common ritual of the human body used to refresh muscles and bloodstreams.
I was doing the latter, whatever the dozens of onlookers will say to the contrary.